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Since my last post I’ve received an ample amount of messages from both females and males. They’ve all encouraged me to keep writing, in some way they’ve commented positive thoughts on my character and they’ve thanked me for my courage. I didn’t expect to hear from men but they too thanked me for my post and told me about all the women they’re going to pass my writing on to. Some of my friends who didn’t quite understand how I felt before and after the abortion contacted me to say my words brought them to tears and to thank me for providing new insight. Words really are powerful and I think I’m slowly starting to realize just how powerful mine are.

One message stood out and I saved it. I don’t ever remember feeling so touched to the point of tears by someone’s words. Maybe it’s overwhelming (in a good way) for me because after years of experiencing different forms of abuse I’ve learned to silence myself. Sometimes I feel as though I shouldn’t speak and what I have to say isn’t worthy. This past weekend has shown me just how important it is for me to let those feelings go. Sometimes I’m torn between knowing exactly what and how much I’m worth and what other people tried to tell me I’m only good for.

Thank you, thank you, thank you to anyone who called or messaged me. You took time out of your day to tell me I’ve helped you but it goes both ways.

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Hello my loves! Coming this fall I am launching a website of my own. Many of you have taken the time to read a personal blog post I wrote sharing my experience having an abortion. However, this new website will be a platform for all women. It will focus on our individual journeys to a place of healing; our individual experience around common experiences shared by all women, and it will be a platform allowing us room to manifest empowerment, love and support. I’d like to give other survivors the opportunity to share their stories of survival. Anonymous submissions will also be accepted.

After the mass amount of views (over 1000 in 2 days), messages I received from women both thanking me for sharing my story and asking me to listen to theirs, I was reminded of just how much we are still living in silence. I understand this because I have also struggled to talk about my trauma as a result of surviving childhood sexual abuse, sexual abuse in my teens, mental abuse, and as I’ve mentioned before losing a child. The more I started to open up, the more I realized I was not alone. And it was through sharing with and listening to stories told by other women that I was able to deal with the internal struggle I was having. I am able to write these posts because I am no longer ashamed. You cannot shame someone who understands not everything is in their control and you can’t shame a fighter. Now, what I’m choosing to do is share what helped me cope, grow, accept, release, and what gave me the strength to move forward. Sharing in a space where you and your words will be appreciated is therapeutic in itself.

This is where my project comes in.

I am working with www.ankitdesigns.com to create an interactive website where women will benefit from expressive, therapeutic writing by processing their life experience, particularly trauma and transition. I am inviting women/self-identified women to share their experiences around sexual abuse, physical abuse, childbirth/loss/motherhood and relationships in a healing, healthy, and honouring environment where other women/self-identified women will have access to this content. We seek what our heart needs.

An official launch party will follow this fall – courtesy of one of my best friends Shaemara (www.shaemara.com), singer extraordinaire/store manager of shoeme.ca, (we’re using their venue in Queen West!).

If you or someone you know would be interested in sharing your story please do not hesitate to contact me.

I am excited to see what will manifest from creating this website but first, my goal is to create an exclusive online community for those of us that have survived and are ready to share how we’ve healed our hearts

Love always ❤

CONTACT: amanda@healherheart.org